Emotions
by ForgeandGred7
Summary: 'Lily Potter had always been good with emotions. Maybe not at handling them, but she'd always been good at showing them'. In her last moments, Lily recalls some of her fondest feelings, her most painful ones and everything in between.


**Emotions.**

Lily Potter had always been good with emotions. Maybe not at handling them, but she'd always been good at showing them.  
**  
Concern.**

It was the first thing that entered Lily's mind as she heard the front door blast open. Concern for her husband, for her son.

For her.

_"Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off!"._

**Fear.**

That's what Lily felt next. She knew it was too late for James and she heard the dull thud of his lifeless body as he hit the ground. Lily screamed. She couldn't help it. James. Her James. Gone forever.

**Desperation**

Is what made Lily do it. She hastily shoved boxes and a chair in front of the door. Anything to keep that monster away from her Harry. The only part of James she had left. They wouldn't hold, she knew as she heard his footsteps approaching but what else could she do?

**Regret.**

If only, if only she and James had kept their wands with them at all times. If only they had stuck with Sirius as their Secret Keeper.

**Betrayal.**

Sirius would have never done that. Not what Wormtail had done. Their so called friend. Lily felt betrayed. Hadn't she been a good friend to Peter? What had she done wrong?

The door was forced open and at the sight of him, Lily dropped Harry into the cot behind her. His matching eyes staring at her inquisitively.

**Curiosity.**

Was this a game? The little boy looked at his mother waiting for her to start laughing, instead she turned her back to him, her arms out wide.

**Confusion.**

How strange. Who was that figure in the doorway, and where was the man who had made all the pretty lights?

_"Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!"._

_"Stand aside, you silly girl... stand aside, now..."_

_"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead-"._

**Bargaining.**

She would do anything. Anything for her Harry. She would risk anything, anyone, to save him. Just as that monster would do anything to tear her family apart.

**Hurt.**

She remembered the hurt she had felt when Petunia had called her a freak. Her older sister who was supposed to love her and care for her. Her older sister whom she loved and cared about.

_I'm sorry, Tuney...So sorry._

**Embarrassment.**

She thought of the time when Severus had insulted her. Called her..that word. It had humiliated her. Was she not as good as everyone else? Didn't she matter as much as Pure-Bloods and Half-Bloods did?

_Why, Sev, why?_

**Forgiveness.**

Oddly enough, Lily was willing to forgive. She did forgive Petunia for calling her a freak, for casting her off. She did forgive Severus for insulting her, deserting her. Above all, she did forgive Wormtail for reasons Lily, herself, didn't understand.

**Happiness.**

She remembered finally kissing James. She remembered marrying him. Holding Harry in her arms for the very first time. She remembered moments laughing with Severus, playing with Petunia, studying with Remus, joking with Sirius.

_"This is my last warning-"._

_"Not Harry! Please... have mercy...have mercy...Not Harry! Not Harry! Please - I'll do anything-"._

**Love.**

It was love that made Lily stand in front of that cot. Love for James. Love for Harry. Her friends. Her family. She knew it was hopeless but it was love that made her keep standing.

_"Stand aside - stand aside, girl-"._

**Bravery.**

Lily was brave. No doubt about that. She would never back down to him, not while Harry was at risk. No, she wouldn't back down. Not ever.

**Sorrow.**

That's what Lily felt as that monster -for his heart was too cold to be human- raised his wand and pointed it at her. Sorrow that she would never see Harry grow up. Go to Hogwarts. Make friends. Get married. Have children. Sorrow that his childhood would not be a normal nor an easy one.

**Acceptance.**

The green light flashed in front of Lily's eyes and she knew it was over for her. She would be with James again in a matter of mere seconds. She understood that and accepted that. It was her time to go, but she'd never leave Harry. Not really.

_Harry, you are so loved. Mama loves you. Dada loves you. Harry, be safe. Be strong._

**Darkness.**

Then there was nothing.


End file.
